r a i n & s k y

Recently, I’ve noticed that my behavior, while truly childish at best and incredibly, wonderfully, SPECTACULARLY stupid, has overall, improved since I first ventured onto these Internets.  Slightly.

1) Rather than resorting to, “ur so stupid omg” as I did at age 12 when in the midst of any sort of e-drama, I can now explain myself calmly and semi-coherently, and avoid starting and curb in-progress “flame wars”.

I’d like to thank my mother for that. You taught me that screaming insults back and forth only makes both parties involved sound like a pair of screeching monkeys. I’d also like to thank my father for teaching me patience and how to keep cool.

2) I can now take any insult directed at me and wholeheartedly agree with it. I’m internet-flame-proof, because I have no self-respect, self-worth, or dignity.

I’d like to thank Mikhail for that. You taught me entirely too much about how to tear myself down and be completely truthful about who I am. ¹ I would also like to thank Strangers with Candy. XD

3) I’m also friend-proof. I don’t consider people my friends unless: 1) I know them in real life and have either ♥ lived next to them for years OR ♥ share common ancestry with them².

I’d like to thank Mikhail in part, as well as the couple backstabbing “friends” out of the group I knew in high school. Thank you for helping me realize that cynicism keeps you out of danger of becoming sociable. *cynical laugh*

4) I have now come to realize that the Internets are truly virtual - they go away when the power is off - and were the world to suddenly and permanently lose its power supply, nothing on here would matter anymore, forever. Indeed, this is nothing more than imaginary in the purest sense of the word, a strangely structured imaginary world at that, but truly imaginary. The only real parts are the things you learn about the real world - like where that pizza shop on 3rd is and how long it takes to get there,how much you owe the IRS, or how much it would cost to ship merchandise as opposed to buy it at the store. The things like personal websites and XHTML and validation, well, those could all disappear and the pizza shop on 3rd will still be there. ³

But Don’t Get Me Wrong - I Still Suck Like a Hoover

I’m still one of the least accomplished, least sociable, stupid, childish people you would ever have the misfortune and displeasure to run into, but, I’m improving. Ever so slightly. That counts for something, if only a punch in the face, right?

Idiocy Explained:

1. Amusingly, only after lying to you for years did I learn this. [↩]
2. Indicating my family. I know, I’m weird [↩]
3. I really love apocalyptic situations in stories, so I’m sort of just letting my mind run free with this. I’ll stop now. [↩]